


Observe and Keep

by Iniren



Category: Star Trek: The Next Generation
Genre: Alternate Universe, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Declarations Of Love, F/M, True Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-13
Updated: 2019-10-13
Packaged: 2020-12-14 00:33:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 8,129
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21006734
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Iniren/pseuds/Iniren
Summary: In era of ST: Picard, Beverly Crusher is being hunted by an organization that wants to use her expertise for their dark purposes.





	1. Tread Carefully in Matters of Life

"Jean-Luc, I'm leaving. I've got to disappear. I can't do what they're asking of me. It's unethical and moreover it's inhumane," she said, desperation in her voice. He was shocked by her agitated and disheveled appearance. She'd been assigned to a special research project at headquarters for the last six months, but returned to the Enterprise unexpectedly as they'd returned to the system for maintenance.

"What's happened?" Jean-Luc asked. She'd been chosen based on her experience with the Borg to create new defensive and offensive capabilities. It appeared her experience with Data and nanites also factored in. Her superiors were pressing her for work that bordered into more and more ethically gray territory. While never saying outright, the research could be used potentially to create a disposable race of artificial beings. 

It had alarmed her enough to start encrypting and backing up her research to a private portable storage device. She knew they would eventually make progress, but she'd started altering her data to make natural progression harder to decipher. After the fierce arguments she initially raised about the research, she knew it was just a matter of time before they caught on.

"Jean-Luc, my lab. Somebody broke in and was searching for my files. I know they didn't find them, so soon enough they'll come after me."

Sensing her fear he said, "Beverly, come with me to LaBarre. We'll find safety there." After the armada and it's aftermath, he'd made the decision to retire to LaBarre. All things indicated his presence put everybody at risk if he stayed in service.

"Jean-Luc, I can't. You'll never be safe with me there and I don't want them to use you to get to me." He knew she was right, but after all their years together, he couldn't imagine being without her. From what she had shared, it had the fingerprints of Section 31 or some other clandestine organization. If she didn't disappear of her own volition, they'd see to it she would on their terms and still find a way to use her expertise.

"I'll miss you. I wish I could express it more fully, but I've run out of words," he whispered, his voice breaking. Over their many years together, his dedication to duty always kept them apart. Now her duty as a physician wouldn't allow her to stay. She pulled him close, looking at him with her glistening blue eyes. 

"I know," she smiled still playful through their sorrow, she added, "maybe you should get a cat or a dog to have breakfast with." 

He laughed at her joke and added, "It's not quite the same." 

Growing serious, "Go, take the shuttle. I'll delete the launch records. There's an outpost, the one for the Celtris III mission, they won't ask questions. Trade it for something nondescript, but reliable." 

"Always ready with a plan, Admiral." She said, nodding resolutely. "I'm heading that direction. On Cardassia or Bajor, they'll still need physicians after the Dominion war. If Wes comes looking for me...," she said. 

"I'll tell him," he nodded. "Beverly, I've never said it, but I love you."

"I know, but thank you. Please keep up with your physicals," she said softly, "I love you too." With that they kissed, not as friends but lovers parted. They knew in all likelihood they would not see each other again. 

=======

"Dr. Voss, Dr. Crusher is gone," the young man announced. He looked at the director, a Vulcan researcher. Her expression always the steady state of calm.

"Gone? Of course, she was due to visit the Enterprise and will be back in a week."

"No, Doctor. She's gone. It appears somebody searched her lab and when security went to investigate, they found her quarters cleared of personal affects."

_ Damn _ . Dr. Voss thought. She'd hoped that she could have her lab and apartment searched and reset while the redheaded doctor was away. She must have return before it was reset and bolted. Now because her absence was innocuously scheduled, she had a head start and undoubtedly help from her friends on the Enterprise. Worse still her research findings were gone with her.

"Now you see, Ensign. The lengths our Federation enemies will go to just to slow our research's progress," she sighed, "Notify Starfleet Security Administration to investigate her whereabouts, hopefully we can find her before it's too late," she ordered. 

She knew once the report was registered, her Tal Shiar operatives would flag it for follow up, clean up loose ends. Her head start and the friends she had would make tracking her difficult, but at least she couldn't work directly against their progress. "A waste really, Beverly, we could have used you," she thought. 


	2. For the Benefit of the Sick

"You have the bridge, Commander. I don't want to be bothered tonight unless it's an emergency."

"Aye, sir." With that they watched the captain walk slowly to the turbo lift. To most people he looked a bit weary, like anybody would after a long day, but only a select few new this was far different. Many had served with him for a decade or more and passed up promotions to stay serving with him. Through the Federation his career had established him as one of the greatest explorers and an expert diplomat, but only those closest to him knew he was still haunted by a tragic past.

"Commander, perhaps it's not my place to ask, is the captain alright?"

"He will be. And you're right, Ensign, it's not your place to ask." With that the conversation was closed and the night shift began.

=======

"Computer, secure my door," the captain barked. This was not a night where synthehol would do, no it had to be real. He trudged to his cabinet and rummaged around. "Chateau Picard. Well I suppose it's appropriate," he thought.

The captain opened his finest and drank just as he intended, straight from the bottle. He made sure he had another bottle just in case the first wouldn't be enough. He had every intention of drowning out everything tonight, the ship, the responsibilities and most importantly his memories.

=====

Will checked the chronometer. It was halfway through the night shift. He knew the captain would be back to himself in time for his next shift, but he always felt uneasy when this anniversary came around. He was the best captain, authoritative, but compassionate; set apart, yet remarkably attuned to his crews' needs. He strove to support and mentor them and they in turn worked to earn his respect and praise.  


Will particularly owed him loyalty for the way the captain had stuck by him after the Borg incident had left many in doubt of his ability as an officer. Not many would put there trust in a man used to kill so many, nor would many take the effort to rescue him. So he stayed with Captain Jack Crusher far longer than many would. Will has been recipient of the captain's support when the nightmares came and he helped the Captain on these dark nights when he tried to forget the losses of his wife and son.

  
"Commander Riker, sir. The sensors are picking up some strange energy readings."

"Define, 'strange,' Ensign."

"Well, it's sort of a fluctuation, similar to a temporal displacement but not quite... Sir!"

A swirl of wind and a flash of light temporarily blinded the bridge crew and when it dissipated, they looked up in shock to find a visitor deposited before them. Immediately, the crew had trained sidearms at their unexpected guest, who responded with hands held high in surrender.

"Who are you and what are you doing here?!" the commander yelled.

"Commander Riker! I don't have much time, I need to talk to your captain."

"Why should I bother him? You still haven't told me who you are!"

"My name is Wesley Crusher."

======

The captain groaned when he heard his door chime. He slowly lifted himself off the floor where he'd fallen asleep. "Come in!" he barked. "This better be good, Commander." he muttered.

The commander saw what he expected, the room dark, the overpowering smell of alcohol, and images strewn about the floor. The captain commemorated the day every year allowing himself the indulgence of wallowing in the feelings he denied himself every other day of the year. 

"I'm sorry to disturb you, sir, especially tonight, but we have an unexpected visitor who claims he needs to speak with you."

"Unexpected visitor?" he slurred, "Well, who is he?" As he buried his face in his hands, trying to rub the stupor from his eyes.

"Dad?"

The captain started at the voice and turned to see a bearded man with dark hair and familiar brown eyes. "Damn you, Get out!" he yelled as he lunged toward the speaker. He staggered nearly crashing to the floor as the unknown man stepped aside. The commander caught his captain and carefully guided him to a chair.To the captain this stranger seemed familiar but he couldn't quite place him. 

"I know this is hard to understand," he said gently, "My name is Wesley Crusher, not your Wesley, but from a parallel universe."

The captain scowled, but grabbing on to the the younger man's arms, he looked hard in his eyes. He studied his face intently and his eyes flashed in recognition. "It's not possible," he rasped and collapsed forward out of the chair onto his visitor.

Wesley looked to the commander, struggling under the captain's awkward form. "What's going on?" he asked.

The commander bent down to help carry the captain to his bed. He lifted him easily and his movements suggested this had happened before. He pulled out a tricorder from the bedside table and scanned the captain. Satisfied with the readings, he closed the device and indicated the seating area.

This Riker and this Wesley had just met, but after some preliminary questions and verification of his DNA and quantum variance, indicating his place of origin, Wesley had quickly built a rapport with the commander. Wesley told him it made sense in his universe, they had been good friends as well. 

"Is my dad alright? Well I guess he's not exactly my dad, but kind of is."

"He'll be alright. You just happened to come on a really bad night... In your universe, I'm not sure what's happened, but in this one Captain Jack Crusher's wife and son were casualties in an accident. Once a year, he lets himself remember...or try to forget."

Wes absorbed the realization that his death had caused the kind of pain he saw in his father's eyes. He'd only seen pain like that in his mother's eyes or in his own. Slowly the captain stirred and said, "I thought I told you to 'Get out!' Will?"

"I know, sir, but he is who he says he is. I had sickbay confirm and Geordi checked, he doesn't match with our universe."

"Will, the hypospray. I can't understand you with my head like this." The commander pulled the device waiting on the captain's desk. Wes watched his father stagger out to join them. As his head cleared, the captain looked hard at his son. Indicating the chair in the corner, Wes pulled it close. "You can go, Will. I think I'll be alright."

Alone the two men regarded one another. Wesley only remembered the father he'd lost as a child. That man was forever young, tall strong with dark hair and gentle eyes. The man before him was nearly forty years older, his hair gray and his gentle eyes, lined with loss. The elder man remembered the small boy with soulful eyes and endless questions. He also remembered the feel of his small lifeless body. Now a full-grown man who shared this memory's soulful eyes watched him.

"Dad, Captain. I know this is hard to understand, but I've come because Mom needs help."

======

Over the next hours, the two men explained their experiences in their respective universes over a simple meal of sandwiches. The elder man described the deaths of his wife and son, when they were crushed while visiting him aboard the Stargazer. How his Captain and friend had to pry him away from their broken bodies. How he left the _Stargazer_ to command a starbase then eventually serve with Captain Keel, until he was offered the _Enterprise_. How he'd blamed himself for his family being aboard the ship because they'd missed him when he failed to return for a scheduled shore leave. How his best friend Jean-Luc, racked with guilt and after losing his first ship, eventually left Starfleet for a career in archaeology.

Wesley described his father's death in his universe, the grief that dominated their lives, leaving Starfleet for awhile, the new start on the _Enterprise_.His mentorship from the Enterprise crew, particularly Captain Picard. His eventual entranceto the Academy and his struggles there. Then seeing his father in a vision telling him to follow his own path and leaving to become a Traveler.

"I'd agree with that," he said, "I'd want you to follow your own path. I wish I could have seen you grow up, Wes, but I can see you and your mother did really well without me."

The younger man nodded, "I guess, but it always felt a little hollow without you. I mean accomplishments are great, but when you're really low, they aren't really what you want, they aren't going to help or comfort you."

The captain nodded and smiled, "When I last saw you, you were at that age where you had nothing but questions for me. Now you're giving me a lesson in wisdom. So what brings you to my universe anyway. You said your mother needs help."

"Yes, my mom is in danger and I have a plan."


	3. Gladly Share My Knowledge

Beverly got up, trudged over to the small cottage kitchen, and made her coffee. Just like she'd learned on Caldos, hand-ground beans, put in the press, hot water from the kettle and wait. She set her pressed coffee beside her breakfast of croissant and fresh fruit. 

Her cottage gardens provided enough for her needs and she got the rest from the settlement in trade. It was a remote outpost in a corner of Cardassia prime, they didn't have a physician nearby, or rather they did, but he was only one man with far too few supplies.When she arrived eight years ago, she offered him her services as a 'healer' to assist him and a standard issue medical replicator in exchange for the cottage and not asking too many questions. He was in no place to refuse.

She heard a knock at the door, checking her chronometer she saw it was too early for regular visitors, not that she expected anybody. "Come in, Damar. It's open," she called. He was the only one here who would come from the settlement at least for a social call. For a medical emergency, they would have called on the comm unit.

Damar Kovat peered into the cottage as he tentatively opened the door. He had been at the medical university when Lakarian city had been destroyed during the Dominion war. He'd lost his entire family that day; parents, siblings, aunts and uncles.He took on the name "Damar" as part of the resistance and vowed that day to honor his family's memory by healing his people. Many educated Cardassians took their families away in search of other opportunities, but owing to his age at the time and the tragic events of the war, he had no one to care for or protect, so he chose to be the protector of the unprotected.Now he served this remote community as best he could as memories of the war faded, but the scars remained.

"You shouldn't leave your door unlocked, Felisa," he sternly warned, "You're alone here."

She scoffed and smiled, "Locking would imply there's something of value here...or something secret." 

"You're valuable to this community...to me. I value your friendship and your skill."

She shrugged and smiled bringing him a plate of food. She knew he wouldn't eat it, but it was a habit from many shared breakfasts from her past. They built a strong rapport and mutual admiration over the years caring for the people of the settlement. It was considered one of the more cooler areas of the planet, which meant as a human she was quite comfortable, but it was unpopular with most Cardassians.

He continued, "I came with news from the Federation apparently there's a retired admiral going rogue on some risky rescue venture. Picard, I think." He noticed a flicker of recognition in her eyes when he said the name.

Again she shrugged. "Why would you think I'd want to know about Federation news?" she asked trying to sound nonchalant.

Damar sighed, "Felisa, we've been friends for years and more importantly I've seen you work. You're not an informally trained 'healer' anymore than I am a Ferengi Daimon. I know Federation training when I see it."

"You Cardassians don't trust anyone, do you?" she smirked. "Look all I can say, is I need to keep a low profile and you need a doctor." 

He had to admire her tenacity. In all the years they'd known each other, Felisa Keel had never alluded to her true identity. The only clue was her work. In their under-equipped clinic, she'd replicated or fashionednearly every tool necessary for state of the art medical care - care you'd only get on a Federation facility or ship. He'd seen evidence of that care on returning soldiers treated at Starfleet facilities. He'd seen how she could treat her Cardassian patients, but when any other species crossed their path, she was able to treat them as well.

"Very well, Felisa. I will say an Obsidian Order operative would have commended your secrecy," he joked, "I'll leave you the tablet with the Federation news...since you're not interested, it'll just be a diversion for you. I'll see you at the clinic later?"

"Yes, late morning."

After he left, Beverly devoured the news on the PADD. She saw the reports of her friend, not much information other than he was 'at large.' She was relieved that it included no information as to his condition.  No news is good news, I suppose.

She also saw some research reports, nothing too specific some small notations about breakthroughs in cyberneticsand development of next generation positronic technology. It was worded vaguely and innocuously, but she'd been a researcher long enough to read between the lines of the abstracts. They were way further along than the reports indicated. Based on the research they wanted her for before she went into hiding, she knew she'd have to stay missing. She would NOT participate in that kind of research.

=====

Damar watched his colleague outside the clinic. She was entering her later years, but he could see by human standards, she'd been likely considered a beauty. Her hair was mostly silver with some faded remnants of golden-red he'd seen on some humans. She was done seeing her patients and was now playing with some of the children. It looked like she was teaching them steps for some human dance. The littlest girl stumbled and for a moment appeared she would burst into tears from frustration, but Felisa pretended to stumble in grandiose fashion inspiring the older children to progressively stumble in grander and grander fashion until they were all giggling in a heap on the floor. He watched her embrace the littlest dancer now recovered from her stumble. He admired her warmth and kindness, he would dare say it matched the devotion of a Cardassian mother.

So distracted by the tender scene, he did not notice the human male approaching the clinic. He looked up in shock when the man asked, "Hello. I'm wondering if a Beverly Crusher works here."

Damar eyed the man suspiciously. He had dark brown hair with the strange facial hair some human men grew. He did not have the look of an aide worker, nor that of a Starfleet officer, but of course spies could look like anybody. "There's nobody by that name here. Why do you want her?"

"I'm her son, I've been looking for her. You're sure there's nobody by that name? She's a doctor?"

"No. You should go for your safety. This community is very _cautious _with outsiders."

"Please if you should see her or anybody matching this description, please have her contact me at this frequency. I have information about her family," he handed Damar a datapad and slowly walked away.Wes knew the man was hiding something, his reaction could not be explained as just caution with an "outsider."

When he left the Academy and his studies as a Traveler began, the first years were difficult and disorienting - bending the fabric of normal space-time could do that. Gradually he'd become so adept at inter-dimensional travel that he no longer required assistance from his Tau Alpha C mentor. When he returned seven years later, he'd found the Federation recovering from the Dominion war. He even served in Starfleet again for a short period on Captain Riker's ship, but eventually the cosmos called him to travel again.

This time when he returned, nobody could tell him where to find his mother, not even the admiral he considered very near a father. Jean-Luc told him, she had to go into hiding years before and was most likely in Bajoran or Cardassian space, but could not be sure. Wes told his former captain, he would hide her in another reality to assure she was out of the reach of her pursuers. So Wes began discreet inquiries, but it had taken him nearly three years to come to this obscure corner, where there were rumors of a human female lived as a healer. While there were many compassionate women who might undertake such a humanitarian endeavor, this woman apparently knew how to use medicinal plants, in addition to modern therapies.

Now he headed to the inn where he was staying and watched surreptitiously from the window. As the valley grew dark, he saw the man from the clinic emerge with a hooded figure. He could tell from the height and rhythm of the figure's gait, he'd found her. Quietly he followed them to a small, isolated cottage outside of the village.He listened quietly in the shadows.

"Felisa, lock your door. I don't know what the man wants or even if it's you he's really looking for, but I fear for your safety," Wes heard the Cardassian whisper.

"Damar, stop worrying I'll be fine. I've taken care of myself for most of my life, I know how to handle myself." He left reluctantly for the village, calling out once more for her to lock her door. 

In the shadows, Wesley's eyes welled with tears at the sound of his mother's voice. She looked older and weary, her face crisscrossed with fine lines, but her eyes still bright as they had always been.She started to go inside once her Cardassian companion was out of sight.

Wesley quietly skirted the perimeter of the small building. Staying in the shadows he knocked quietly at the lighted window. He could see her turn toward him, but could not see him. "Who's there? Show yourself or I'll call the settlement," she produced a phaser for her pocket and pointed it toward the window, while looking and listening.

"Mom. It's me open the door," he quietly called from the door.

"Wesley?!?" She knew his voice immediately and searched for sight of him. She quickly opened the latch and gasped as she saw him. Not the lanky child that had left her before, but a full grown man with a beard. She reminded him of the last time she'd seen Will Riker. She saw a flicker of movement behind her son and quickly pulled him in and down.

Wesley turned in surprise from the floor only to catch his mother in a blur of motion. She smoothly pulled his attacker by the hand and gracefully swept his leg out from under him. As he attempted to rise, the man was rewarded with an assertive neck pinch and he slumped to the floor.

Turning to her son she said, "Close the door quickly and help me with him."

"Mom? Who is he?" He said as he quickly shut and bolted the door.

"Damar, he's a friend, never thinks I can handle myself."

"I think he'll know now," he said, his face a mix of shock and admiration. He'd always taken for granted that his mother was strong and could handle herself, but seeing evidence in the form of an unconscious Cardassian was a new experience. He stood quickly and indulged in a long hug. Pulling away, he saw her wiping the tears from her eyes. "I've missed you," he said as she grabbed her tricorder to scan Damar.

"Well it's nothing too serious, but maybe an analgesic. Hand me my med kit," she said indicating the shelf behind him. As the hiss of the medication dissipated, the Cardassian shook off the disorientation. "How are you feeling?" she asked gently. 

Bewildered, he sat up and said, "I'll be alright." Looking at Wesley and rubbing his bruised back he said, "This was the man looking for you before. I was worried, but I can see my assistance wasn't necessary."

"Well, Damar, meet my son Wesley," she said as Wesley extended his hand. "Wes, how did you get here? How did you find me?"

He said, "It wasn't easy. Apparently not too many people want to give up their doctor. Mom, I've been looking for you for three years."

"I'm so sorry, when I left I had to do so quickly. We thought it better I leave no trace, nothing that could link to my disappearance."

"Mom, I've come to get you. I've learned how to jump realities with others. Nobody could follow you and even then they'd have to find you amongst an infinite set of realities."

Damar looked back and forth between the mother and son. He could see she was considering leaving and while he would hate losing her, he could not in good conscience ask her to stay.

Nodding he said, "So let me know about the patients I need to follow up on." She smiled and Wesley watched her list off all her patients from memory. She knew not only their physical needs but also personal considerations that would help a physician not just treat, but heal a person. When he was younger he took for granted her care and efficiency when he watched her work. Now with the maturity that comes with years and her absence, he couldn't help but feel pride.

Beverly quickly gathered only the most essential items, living simply for so many years it was a simple matter. She turned to her colleague and friend. He wasn't the type of man to weep, but emotion was evident in his eyes. "Feli- I mean, Beverly. I will endeavor to care for my patients with the kindness you have always showed. I hope one day to pass on what I have learned from you as well."

She nodded and hugged him, whispering, "Thank you. Go now, the less you know the safer you and the settlement will be." He nodded and he quickly slipped out into the night. She turned toward her son and asked, "What now?"

"First I'm going to take us to a shuttle I have hidden innearby system. Then I'll need to recover from the jump before we can get to the other reality," he said as he took her hands.

"Where'd you get a shuttle?"

"A friend helped me. Now just relax, Mom."

The two merely held hands and Beverly watched as her son closed his eyes. She could hear the sound of rushing wind, but saw no evidence of movement in the room around her, then she saw parts of her son phase in and out in progressively larger proportions. She was slowly overwhelmed with what seemed a blazing light until she lost all sensation.

=======

"Director Voss, there was a report generated on the Crusher case from the Cardassian Union. Apparently a human male has made inquiries about her on Cardassia. The reports say he claimed to be her son. It's a miracle considering she's been missing for so many years," the young officer reported. He'd been there when she went missing and if a close contact was making inquiries it was possible she'd survived.

"Thank you, Lieutenant. I'll notify Federation Security to follow up."

"It's interesting because the only reason I found the report was because I had the computer cross reference this report with one from Temporal Investigations. Apparently her son, Wesley Crusher is named in possible temporal violations for jumping between realities."

"That is interesting. Perhaps we could obtain his help in locating his mother," she said. It would have appeared as professional concern and in a way it was, though of a different nature. She considered what she did as a profession and accordingly appreciated anytime fate seemed to offer a bonus. A Traveler and his time or reality jumping would be advantageous in the development of the cybernetic program. Later on secure channels she would mobilize a team of operatives.

"Lieutenant, I believe you are capable of overseeing our research work here. I will leave myself to investigate the reports in Cardassia myself."The young man nodded and left. Beverly Crusher's loss to their program had been an embarrassment. Failure to locate her for so many years was enraging and called her suitability in the Tal Shiar into question. Capturing Beverly Crusher and the potential of a Traveler to study was an irresistible opportunity for redemption.


	4. Awareness of My Frailty

When her eyes fluttered open, Beverly saw the grey ceiling of a shuttle. She rubbed her eyes trying to rein in the waves of dizziness and disorientation. She tried to list her head when she felt a pair of strong hands gently eased her back. "Easy, Beverly. I felt pretty bad my jump, but it'll pass," he said.

The voice was familiar, like something from a childhood dream or a first generation holorecording, faded and flickering. She vaguely remembered Wesley mentioning a friend before their jump. "Wesley?" she asked.

"Resting. He'll sleep for a good twelve hours and be groggy. When he made the jump with me and the shuttle in tow, he had to rest for a good week. Apparently traveling with 'baggage' is rough.He's been working so hard to find you, it's taken a lot out of him. You've done an amazing job with him, Bev. I'm proud of him." 

At that phrase, Beverly suddenly recognized the voice. Her eyes snapped open. "Jack?" She started at her long-dead husband, no longer the young man she last met, but one who had appeared to age as she had over the years. His hair had greeted, his face fuller and lined with years. She slowly sat up to scrutinizing him, reaching up to touch his face and gasping when she realized he was truly real.

"I take it Wes didn't tell you," he said. "I told him, he should but he kept saying he wanted to surprise you."

"I think he succeeded," she said. Her mind was still swimming and she struggled to steady herself against the shuttle bulkhead. 

"Look. Your head is going to feel like that for awhile. You lie down and close your eyes for a moment and I'll explain." She lowered herself as if the waves of nausea were pushing her back down in the bunk.

"Wes found me in another reality. He wanted you to be in a safe place with friends, he figured your husband might be a good choice. And before you say anything, I know I'm not your husband, not exactly, but things in my reality didn't quite pan out and I'd still like to help you."

"So what happened to me?" she asked softly.

"My Beverly and Wes were killed a long time ago. I was delayed on a mission and would have missed a shore leave, but somehow you sweet talked Jean-Luc into letting you come aboard the Stargazer. There was an accident." Beverly listened as his voice became progressively labored. Her own tears gathered behind her closed eyes and she reached out to comfort him. 

"How old was Wes?" She asked softly.

"Four almost five. He was so excited to see the ship, peppered me, well everyone, with questions," he smiled at the memory and patted her hand. "Wes told me about your Jack. I'm so sorry, Beverly. I should have, he and I should have done things differently, made our family a priority."

"Jack, we were so young. We didn't know any better," she said as she slowly sat up, "I'm feeling a bit better and a bit..."

"...hungry?" He finished. "Whatever reality some things don't really change," he laughed bringing her a plate of food. "I remember watching you eat on our honeym-... never mind." They both blushed recalling a common intimate memory. After an awkward silence that seemed to linger endlessly, Beverly refocused herself.

"Look, Jack. I know this is ridiculously awkward and strange, but it is good to see you. So what happened after?"

"After the accident? Left the _Stargazer_, did a few years at the shipyards, Walker eventually convinced me to go back out with him on the _Horatio_. Eventually they offered me the _Enterprise_, from what Wes told me many of the same events happened. Farpoint, Borg, Romulans, Cardassians. Though I wasn't captured by the Borg, that was Will. Deanna helped him a lot, but his confidence was shaken and he's stayed with me on the _Enterprise_ since then. I'm not sure the Admiralty felt comfortable with him in command, since Wolf 359."

"That was Jean-Luc."

"Wes told me. He said you helped him a lot," he paused wondering if he should ask. "Since Wes is asleep, I'll ask this, but you don't have to answer. I got the impression there was something Wes didn't want to tell me about Jean-Luc. Specifically about the two of you, but..."

"You want to know," she finished. He nodded. "He helped us a lot while I was on the _Enterprise_. We were very good friends, regular breakfast companions, occasional dinner companions. Consoled one another when our other relationships failed or fizzled. He admitted he was in love with me while we were married. Felt terrible guilty about it."

"That clears up some things. It always seemed he took your death harder than I did. Left Starfleet after he lost the _Stargazer_ and we lost touch after I left the ship. I just figured he blamed himself for the accident and I blamed myself for you being there. So you were together?"

"No. Always close but not quite. It's as if the fates just wouldn't write a story for us together. In a way I don't really mind. We cared for, loved, each other maybe more than any romantic relationship. I kissed him good bye before I went into hiding."

"That's too bad," he said sadly.

She looked at him in surprise. "Really?" she asked incredulously.

"Sure, I was gone, he's a good man, my best friend and," he said playfully, "if it took like forty plus years, it must mean I'm pretty unforgettable." The two erupted in laughter.

"So what about you?" She asked as their giggles subsided.

"I tried, but it wasn't the same. Felt like I could ask somebody to take the risk with me out there."

"I guess that means, I've ruined you for anybody else," she said jokingly.

"Yes," he said simply.

The simplicity of the answer stunned her and it hung in the air while he turned toward the shuttle controls. She couldn't see his face, but knew he must be serious. The Jack she remembered might have passed it off as a joke, but that was a young Jack, one who hadn't lost, and had barely lived. This Jack had lost and lived alone for most of his life. She knew what she represented to him, but didn't know if she could be what he wanted. Still she knew the same kind of loss.

"I don't know what to say," she said.

"Don't say anything right now. Our priority is getting out and we can't do that until Wes is strong enough. This star creates enough interference to make it nearly impossible to scan for us until we're in visual range. Plus I still remember a few evasive maneuvers," he said. She nodded and left to check on Wesley. When she returned, she asked, "Jack, there was a type of shielding presented at the Altine Conference years ago. It allows a vessel to enter a sun's corona, could we install that? It could buy us time if anybody does find us."

The man nodded and pulled it up. "It's not proven, Beverly."

"It is in this reality, Jack. I helped prove it or rather I tested it for Dr. Reyga," she said. He looked at her in surprise. "Well can you install the modifications or not?"

"Yes, Dear," he said laughing. "I suppose there are thing I've accomplished in my reality that don't exist in yours too."

"Well maybe we'll get a chance to figure the differences out. Get to know each other again," she said softly. 

=======

The  _ Trajan _ continued regular sensor sweeps of the area. After a series of discrete inquiries to the Cardassian Central Command through official channels and through their operatives, Praetor Voss had determined the Crushers must have been in a nearby system. The provincial doctor where she had hidden for years proved of limited use even with the memory scanners. She had given minimal information, so there was nothing to glean from his mind.I'm away it was for the best, the scanners caused minimal damage and he would likely recover over time. She may be exacting but she did appreciate useful individuals even Cardassians.

"Praetor, there is no evidence of a shuttle in this system."

"Very well, we'll try the next one. The gravimetric interference coming from that system's star may hide a small vessel," she commanded. While she felt more comfortable on her cloaked vessel, the difficulty in locating the shuttle was frustrating. She was beginning to worry that they may have escaped already.

"Praetor, there are some anomalous readings that may indicate a small ship."


	5. The Skills of Another are Needed

Wesley watched as his parents laughed. In the week since he'd pulled his mother from the Cardassian settlement, they'd all reconnected.He knew it had been a stretch of logic that these two people separated by realities and decades might connect, but thus far he could at least see them being great friends. Both as a grown son and the boy who lost his father couldn't help but be pleased.

He was nearly recovered enough that he felt safe jumping with his parents and the shuttle. Enough that they had planned where they may settle in Jack's reality. Baku also existed with its youth preserving metaphasic rings. Jack had an open invitation to return and felt under the circumstances his family would be welcome.His mother worried about the friend's she'd leave behind, but he promised to return alone and leave a message with both her Cardassian colleague and the Admiral once she was safety settled.

The computer chimed a perimeter alert and the three looked to one another.

"Beverly, it looks like we're being scanned, but I can't find the source."

"A cloaked ship?" she replied.

As if to answer, the shuttle rocked with a blast. They immediately moved to positions; the captain and doctor at the controls and son at tactical. "Indirect hit, I think they can't target us with the interference, but it's just a matter of time," Wesley replied.

The shuttle and its occupants shuddered with the increasing blows. The roar of the engines as they attempted evasive maneuvers was deafening. A final volley of phasers caused a console to burst showering sparks before the Captain, as he clutched an injured arm.The doctor sprung to address his injuries as her son smoothly switched to maintain navigation.

Frowning as she examined the wound, she yelled, "Jack, I need to deal with this!" 

"Later, we need to get out of here!" he answered. 

"Deploy the shielding, we can hide out in the corona or at the least, we'll be able to see their wake if they pursue." Wesley tapped at the controls and the shuttle lurched as it hurtled toward the corona. The computer spit out hull temperature warnings at annoyingly frequent intervals.

"Dad, behind us! I can see the shadow of a Valdore class ship!"

"Fire! All weapons!"

"Minimal damage," Beverly read.  


"How the hell is a cloaked ship able to keep its shields up?!" the captain asked.

"Different universe," Wesley said as his father rolled his eyes.

"We're being hailed!"

Immediately the image of Praetor Voss appeared on the screen. Beverly gasped as she recognized the former director of the covert research team, now in her true form as a Romulan praetor.

"Doctor Crusher, you've been missed these many years. Surrender now and we'll release your accomplices."

"I will not participate in your research, Voss!"

Scowling she answered, "This isn't about the research anymore. It's about tying up loose ends."

"Sorry we can't accommodate you," the captain quickly answered. 

"Very well. Your shielding will not protect you forever. We'll see you soon." The screen went blank and showed two smaller vessels leaving the large ship to surround their escape routes from the corona. The smaller ships began firing phasers in small burst, not enough to destroy them just to keep them under pressure.

"They're trying to force us out," Jack muttered.

"Jack, maybe I should.."

"No, if you're a loose end. We are too," he answered. Turning to his son he asked,"Wes! Can you make the jump yet?"

"There's no way I can get us and the shuttle out!"

"No. Just us! Can you jump us to my Enterprise on my signal?"

"Jack, what..?"

"Wes, can you do it?!"

"Yes."

"Ok. Get ready for my signal." He began to punch assorted commands into the console. Wes stood behind his parents and began collecting his thoughts for the jump. Beverly watched her son's face grow still as her husband furiously maneuvered the ship on a collision course with the imposing Romulan ship.

Holding his hand over the controls he asked once more, "Wes, Now!"

Again the cabin swirled and Beverly could see the Captain press the controls and the ship lurch suddenly. Again her son and alternate husband began to phase in and out, then the blinding radiance and silence.

=====

"Praetor, the human shuttle is on an collision course!"

"Fire!" The praetor commanded. The officer complied immediately and they watched as the shuttle disintegrated in a burst of light and debris. "Evidence of survivors, remains?"

"Negative, praetor. Total destruction."

She scowled. She had wanted to take them alive, but once again she'd failed. She considered having her crew scanning for evidence of a Traveler's jump, but felt it better left unknown. Eliminating them wasn't ideal, but allowing them to escape would have been unforgivable. There would be questions now, but not punishment and she still had a cybernetics program to lead.

"Very well, Lieutenant. Notify Tal Shiar headquarters of their destruction. Then set a course to home space."


	6. The Joy of Healing

Beverly could hear the sound of muffledvoices. Vital signs, requests for medication, care orders, prognoses. It was all muddied in her senses, but slowly coming into clarity. Her eyes flickered open to what seemed blazing lights. Sickbay. Only sickbay had such brutally bright lights.

"Dr. Crusher? How are you feeling?" She heard a crispy, efficient female voice ask. 

"Wes? Jack?" she asked.

The voice reported, "Wesley is resting, his neurotransmitters are a bit out of balance, but are slowly leveling out. He's in stasis until they stabilize. The Captain had lacerations and burns to the chest and shoulder. We've repaired them and he's resting. Now, Doctor, how are you?"

"I've felt better. Where are we?" She asked.

"You're on the Enterprise, well the Enterprise of this reality. I'm Dr. Katherine Pulaski." Beverly lifted her head for a better look at her physician and her surroundings. "Doctor?"

"I'm sorry, I guess I'm not used to being a patient in my own sickbay," Beverly explained. "What's my prognosis?"

"Full recovery with strict adherence to medical advice will get you discharged from MY sickbay," she replied.

"Yes, Ma'am."

======

Beverly sat beside her son's biobed holding his hand through the stasis field. They'd put him in a private room of the sickbay away from the main activity of sickbay. She was lost in her thoughts and tuned out the activity until she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"He'll be alright, Bev," Jack said trying to reassure her.

She turned to him with a half smile and replied, "I know. Thinking over that last weeks, it's just a strange feeling." He had his left arm in a sling for extra support, she knew the burns would have been addressed. He looked at her quizzically and pulled a chair up beside her. "He came to rescue me," she said, "I'm not used to being a patient, not used to having a husband, not used to being rescued. I'm used to taking care of myself or others."

He nodded as he took her free hand between his. "You were always so independent, I loved that about you. I thought this woman could handle herself, could handleanything the galaxy could throw at her. But over time what was most special to me were the times you'd let me help you." She looked at him in surprise.

"The times when you'd let me bring you coffee when you'd cancel a date because of a big exam, when you'd let me carry a mountain of PADDs so you could study at your quarters instead of the library, the time when I slept on the couch because you'd cried yourself to sleep on my bed after losing your first patient."

She smiled as she softly said, "That sounds awful for you."

He chuckled, "Maybe on the surface, but I was hopelessly in love with you, was happy anytime I could be helpful or get a smile directed at me."

She leaned into his shoulder and pulled his good arm around her. She could feel Jack resist a little. "Beverly, I don't expect you to feel anything for me. I just wanted to help, sort of give myself a chance save you, since I wasn't able to in my reality."

"A second chance?" she offered. He nodded. "Well maybe it is for both of us. We've been alone a long time."

"Jean-Luc?" he asked.

"He doesn't need me and he can't give me what I need."

"What do you need, Bev?"

"A rest. A home. A little peace."

"Baku can do that and give us some time back too."

"Jack."

"Hmm?"

"Kiss me."

"Bev, you don't h---"

She interrupted him by pulling him into a kiss. He was cautious, not wanting to push or pressure her, but it was an irresistible experience. It wasn't a dream nor a memory; she was real, warm, and passionate. He determined if nothing else came of them, he'd consider their most recent adventure worthwhile.

Slowly she pulled away and he looked at her, his lips still burning. "I've been loving the ghost of you for decades and now you're here," he said breathlessly.

"You know, I think I've been doing the same with the ghost of you and now somehow we're getting a chance to finish the story together."

======

Jean-Luc snapped awake with the sound of his communicator. Despite the years on the vineyard, he'd kept the habit from decades in command. "Yes, Picard here," he answered.

"Admiral, the computer detected a quantum fluctuation in your quarters. Is everything alright?" a young woman asked.He looked around his small cabin and answered, "Nothing seems amiss."

"Alright, sir. Sorry to disturb you."

Now awake, Jean-Luc rose to get a drink of water and noticed something on his bedside table. A small note reading, "Transfer of personnel complete. Wesley," He turned the note over to find it was in actuality a photograph. He smiled to see an image he recognized as the Baku village and his two best friends, restored to near permanent youth. They were happy, they were safe and whatever loss he might have felt was overwhelmed by a deep happiness for them. He settled back into his bunk and slept more peacefully than he had in years.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm trying to give myself some out if ST:Picard doesn't mention Beverly at all. References bits from the trailer, acknowledges that Beverly would have had an expert with both Borg and a good deal of cybernetics working with Data. Jack is always haunting the background in Beverly's life, so I thought maybe I should put Wesley's alternate reality explorations to work. Hope you like it.


End file.
